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November 19, 2012
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Lately I have been noticing people asking me a similar question. "Are you happy?" Now at first I always said the redundant "yes" response, but lately I've been really thinking about it. Now people are obviously asking me this because they think I'm not, and this question is coming from family, friends and my employees. So maybe I need to look into their curiosity. Two years ago, hell even 8 months ago I had no idea I would be living where I am now, and I have a tendency to relocate thousands of miles every year or so anyway, but maybe it's time I actually look to build a home. Which is an idea completely new to me since I haven't even had an address since early 2010.

This rambling leads me to my point, I think and have thought for quite some time that I am happy, I am fortunate enough to travel the country following race car drivers and athletes that I have looked upto for years and ultimately become close friends with. I've stood at racetracks I only imaged I would dream about, I've been part of world record breaking stunts. I've witnessed some incredible accomplishments and been the guy chosen to document them. I've experienced incredible emotional highs and lows with some incredible people. But the question returns... "Am I happy" honestly I don't know, my corporate day job for a Fortune 500 company dictates my life and I've also lost my passion and desire for photography as I only shoot a couple events a year now, but I've created new hobbies and found new passions, including cycling which is my primary focus now. Between charity rides and training for nationals next year I keep busy and I keep my mind off of most things that were a huge part of my life in the past. I think for now I am content and I will get back into photography when the time is right.

Now my question to you, anyone who reads this, my friends, fans or a random passer by.... are you happy? What defines happiness to you?
  • Mood: Neutral
  • Listening to: Pavlov
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:iconfesoferbex:
*Fesoferbex Apr 27, 2013  Professional General Artist
Contentment IS happiness, when you realize you have ENOUGH in life... and that you'll just enjoy whatever is next...whatever may come, whoever you may work for, whatever door opens...

THAT is really happiness, making the best of everything no matter how big or small...

y'know, just from a random passer-by

I miss Colorado, btw, love your pix of Pikes Peak... oh I really really do miss the hill climb!
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:icontonypringle:
To quote a friend of a friends Dad
"Happy? What the fuck do you want to be happy for?"
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:iconkanokus:
Very true Tony!
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:iconethanrobson:
~EthanRobson Nov 20, 2012  Professional Photographer
If it helps, I know I'm not. I've given up and lost far too much to chase my dreams and I don't know where it will end. Not that I let them, but a lot of people have gone out of their way this last year to take the fun out of life and my career for me. I'm lost (again) to be honest, I'm trying to find the enjoyment in the little things and that's the best thing I can hold on to, the last little shred of hope.

I'd just about do anything right now to change my situation, but I don't know where to start. So much has gone wrong that I could just about start over again, but I need to see where 2013 goes, then I can make that decision.
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:iconkanokus:
I know the very feeling Ethan, i feel i have brought down some family in my endeavors to chase my dreams and may need to evaluate what i go after next year
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:iconcanadiandesperado:
~CanadianDesperado Nov 19, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Yes. I'm happy. I've a good family, I have good friends, I have my health, I have a good body to train with, I've my wits about me (for the most part), and I have dreams that I am pursuing. I also have a relationship with God that has it's rough points, but is there and real. That's the biggest thing, I guess. Yeah, these are the things that make me happy. How would I know what happiness is? I've been unhappy, and what I feel now isn't it. When I was unhappy, I was having a rough time with my family, I couldn't bring myself to communicate with them and my friends, I'd isolate myself away, and feel discontent, but not do anything about it. I'd turn to transient things that brought me a body chemical high, but left me feeling empty after the rush had worn away. I felt nothing, and then it would scare me, and I'd turn back to that which had brought it on, hoping it would take the nothingness away. It didn't. I felt pointless, just another drone carrying out the motions to satiate what I thought were needs. Just another speck of salt in the sandy beach. There one moment, gone the next. It took a lot to break that cycle, but it's broken. I have purpose, I have dreams, and I'm working to achieve them. My family and I are working together again, and I no longer hide myself away from the world. I stride through it now, no longer fearing the seeming nothing of our existence, but rather understanding it for what it is, another cycle within a universe of cycles, all spinning in cohesive chaos. Now, that knowledge excites me. But, I'm getting too deep again.

Yeah, I'm happy.
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:iconkanokus:
Thank you for that response, Its great to hear you've worked to overcome obstacles and have dreams you continue to reach for. I use to drink a lot in my last work assignment as i was in a community where i didn't really know anyone and didnt particularly care for the town. I have since moved near the rocky mountains and taken up cycling as my escape from my work life, which has become very rewarding
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:iconcanadiandesperado:
~CanadianDesperado Nov 20, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
The Rockies and Cycling, two things I too enjoy. I live near the Rockies, just south of Grande Prairie, Alberta. I and my family used to do horse camping trips in the Rockies Kakwa region. Some of my most treasured memories are of riding high up on the mountains, looking down on the wide and beautiful wonder of the world. We've since no longer had time to do that for the past couple years, but are working towards having the time again. As for cycling, during the summer I ride my bike to work (kinda hard to ride a bike in two feet of snow up here, lol, so no winter riding). I found that to be very rewarding as well, because my physical health improved impressively, and with it, my mental health. I knew I could rely on my body and my bike to get me to my destination and that boosted my confidence dramatically.

I'm glad to know you've moved close to the mountains, there's something about them that is good for the soul. The air just seems to be clearer up there.
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